Forgive me I'm always horny when I wake up
Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
we were naked in his bed and he told me all about what a "baller" alexander the great was.
Their bromance is so intense that they don't even eye-fuck when they see each other....they eye-make-love.
I drunkenly sent a picture of my scrotum to the entire baseball team last night
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
His ankle bracelet only gets in the way when I'm trying to take off his pants.
sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.
I won the booty shaking contest by mooning the whole bar
You shouldn't have to. I think you should bust into work like "pay homage to my magical vagina!"
The fact that my boss lets me drink on my lunch break makes Mondays much easier.
She's asleep in a fisher-price toy car
Just puked. First it was bright neon blue then it turned to bright lime green. How does that even happen? And wtf was I drinkin last night?
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