some dude is getting blown right outside the bar in his car. reeediculous
class
he's dribbling her head like he's fucking allen iverson
shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.
I woke up this morning and the first thing i saw was the harry potter tattoo on his left butt cheek.
Changed my sheets. Found a can of rockstar, crushed bag of tostitos, used tissues, and enough of both of our clothes to make a whole outfit.
dude I'm not 100% but I think your mom is sexting me.
He made me meet him in the baby department of walmart where he was waiting with his pregnant girlfriend. Time for a new dealer
I'm trying to decide whether it's worth it to masturbate in this gas station bathroom
God I hope the gutter I die in is nice. You know, for a gutter.
You better fucking tell me or I'm turning blow job week into go fuck yourself week.
So did I or did I not flash an entire concert last night?
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins
Alvin just won tickets on the radio. I guess he's out of jail.
He literally lured me in the house with his cat then we ended up fucking on the living room couch while the cat just sat there and watched
I'm just impressed that you can puke without losing your gum
I was lying I actually don't, I hope a reindeer shitted in her bed
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