Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
she said your name and I thought she was asking me to motorboat her. Best. Miscommunication.Ever.
I got to work, greeted my staff, then went into the bathroom to throw up. Who hired me to run a business???
she gave me a handjob while we were watching elf.... it's that time of year again!!
11am puke and rally. THIS is what I'm gonna miss about college.
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
We don't need a hotel, we'll just sleep in the post office.
When I got up in the middle of the night, puked in his trash can, and snuck out the front door, I pretty sure he knew it was over.
Also I think he would slowly, painfully, die. You really can't live without a penis. You'd explode.
Holy walk of shame. Fuck someone's house. I walked past a family eating their free continental breakfast wearing yesterday's makeup
He makes me want to shower. It must be love.
Haha! I swear, it's like I'm talking to Buddha with a slutty agenda. You are so full of wisdom.
The guy next to me on the bus has one hole in his jeans that has over 20 mini dicks drawn on his leg. Classic.
It was like a baby arm holding another baby arm holding an apple grove. Fuckin huge!
I couldnt face her after that wonderful, terrible blowjob. Made a rope out of towels and climbed out her bathroom window.
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