my brain is sober enough to have a conversation.. but my arms feel nice
If a woman tells you she has been pink socked...don't move forward with her.
When we made out her lip\nose ring fell out in my mouth. Awkward?
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
my phone cant type all the emotion im having
He kept buying me shots of tequila. I decided to just save myself the half hour of toilet hugging and tell him straight up that I intended on sleeping with him. We got Tacos on the way home with all the money we saved.
I have blocked the memory from my mind. He is just a fuzzy cloud floating with my other bad decisions..
Apparently drunk me thought it was time for a career change. I woke up with a message from Mcdonalds saying that I was hired as the new cashier.
Do I have to formally apologize to Brett for flashing him?
Caleb has a beard comb now. Also I have a pube comb now too. May or may not be related incidents
So after taking my shirt off, he pulls my bra off like a hockey jersey. FUCKIN PRO. Guy knew what he wanted.
Moral of the story: I had sex to Back to the Future last night.
im buying my prof a giftcard to the state store bc he talked ab crying into a glass of tequila so he deserves it
I just put a pill up my vagina. It was little like a quail egg. There is so much happening up there right now.
If I die bedazzle my coffin please.
Randomize
