If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
They're making scrambled eggs at 2 in the morning... with rum
he said he wanted to butter my pancake. i thought it was sexual, but he went downstairs and made pancakes. i need to stop dating fat guys.
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
Just realized how many men I've had sex with for the first time in St. Patty's Day past. Currently sending "HAPPY SEXIVERSARY" texts...
First if all, whoever designed penis shaped ice cubes is clearly daring me to shove them up my vagina
My sunday was babysitting three big, drunk, crying Swedes. Unless your day involved four or more giant drunk swedes I don't want to hear about it.
Ugh a 13 year old just asked me why people drink, I had to explain it without making it sound good. I need a drink.
She had never heard the term "grundle" before. Classiest girl I've met in months
Found a trail of Taco Bell hot sauce packets through the garage to our back door and cheese in my bra. I'll say it was a successful Sunday Funday.
I just want him to hold me after a bad midterm. Is that even too much to ask for after sleeping with him twice?
Y’all did coke off my Puff The Magic Dragon plate.😂
I woke up with sticky red stuff all over my sheets, face, and chest. Apparently after I blacked out I thought eating ribs in bed was a good idea
I guess it's too forward to greet him with a blow job?
The only good thing about being back at work is supply room boom boom with my office husband
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