tweet Hawks Win!! tweet
That's how twitter works, right?
I just put anything in between my legs and hope for the best.
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
he puked in his toast at dennys. after snoopdogg high fived him. couldn't be prouder to be his bro in law.
Maybe I should forgo underwear.
This is a family BBQ no?
I took a few sips of my hugeee bottle of liquid Vicodin and smoked my one hitter and now I'm going thru my attic like Indiana Jones
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
Couldn't finish, so she gave me "the tap," and I had to leave the mound early. Nothing worse than the long walk back after the manager comes out and asks for the ball.
Well sure, my hetero side is thrilled, but my gay side is soooo judging
Got a snapchat from Megan last night showing you sobbing about a burrito on the floor with Dan in the background trying not to laugh his ass off
Rome wasn't built in a day - my bedroom skills weren't obtained in some boring monogamous relationship. Same thing. Right?
The hospital waiting room is starting to become a very familiar place to me.
He a gives rim jobs, because, of course a guy who opens doors and makes reservations would lick your anus..like a gentleman.
Cover your peen. We're going out.
I did what i always do when i miss him; masturbate and watch Bridges of Madison County.
Randomize
