I wish I loved anything like you love Tequila.
Just saw the first guy I gave head to lose in the french open...some how I feel better that my mistake made it to the same mistake as our relationship, the third round. Don't judge.
saw a man tazing a raccoon in the middle of the street last night... normal
I'm eating mac and cheese for dinner that way when I puke later it'll be festive halloween orange.
Stripper pole. Sore legs. More vaca money.
Have you fucked anyone in the hospital yet because obviously this illness isnt worth it unless you do. I MISS YOUR HEALTH
He dared me to drink a bottle of olive oil in exchange for a 30 pack... So much for loosing the freshman fifteen this year.
You're mold. I may or maynot have puked blood this morning.
I only want to make out with him. Unless I get hungry. In that case I will take him home and screw him as a distraction from eating.
Just found a pack of birth control on the corner of Oakland and Thomas, so if your desperate its up for grabs.
I don't see how I managed to fuck up so much shit in an hour and a half..
I just threw up vodka and hot dogs in a handicapped stall with someone in it who couldn't make me leave because he couldn't walk.
I don't think he cares about your inhospitable uterus.
He told me he needed "space" but then goes and likes my insta of panacakes.. Done.
All I want is some guy to eat me out while I work on grad school things then go on his way
Randomize
