# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
maybe if you didn't yell 'buh duh duh da duh da dats all folks' when you came she wouldn't have left last night
You told me you were pretty sure you were god because you knew everything about everyone.
There should be a blender full of rum, tea, and grape jelly in the freezer. She thought it was a good idea until she blew chunks.
Explain to me how "cheap asian titties" is a complement?
Whatever dude, I don't feel bad about it. If my girlfriend finds out even SHE should give me a high five. That bitch was fine
Guess whose mug shot is NOT on the Internet anymore?!?!
This gem of a conversation has been brought to you be weed
Also, if he asks how he's doing orally I can probably ask if we're exchanging Christmas presents?
It's okay, big boobs are better than running.
I need to get all the one night tinders in my system before I move back in with my parents
There is a reason my most meaningful relationship since 2012 has been with Duracel...
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
How do I put this... You're dating Ricky from Trailer Park Boys. Stop eye-fucking him and actually listen to what he says for once. He actually said "I self-learned that myself, basically" while rolling a joint. He's worse than your unskilled magician ex that accidentally cut off three of his own fingers
Just found out my dad smokes weed too. Mom, grandma, all aunts and uncles, and now my dad too. It's like I'm genetically engineered to be a stoner.
Randomize
