He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
look to my right... shes dancing like she's playing dance dance revolution and her character is a retarded, drunken moose
Are you being sarcastic? I can't tell this time because you're in the hospital.
i swear, as soon as they invent a cure for herpes, he's mine.
I just shotgunned a beer alone in the bathroom...what do you expect from me
A man pulled out his penis last night and when I said I wouldn't touch it, he said, "that's fine it just needs to breathe".
Well on a lighter note, I had sex in a food truck.
Quick how do you hit on a guy in the car behind you? It's important.
I needed 3am water. Not 3am shots of rum.
Fucking holidays. How do I have this many men who want to fuck me and none of them are available when I'm ready to blow my top?
the quiet that you are hearing is a silent suggestion that you should go fuck yourself
Like you can't just be like oh bb and THEN SEND ME A FUCKING PICTURE OF MY 8TH GRADE FAT SELF IN A TACO COSTUME
Drunk you needs to learn how to call sober me, so sober me can talk your drunk vagina down.
What doesn't this kid understand that our relationship is not going past the blacked out blowjob I gave him on his birthday?
Well, not only did I find out the Top Knight has roof access, I also let a guy I just met eat me out on the roof. Seems like a lot of wins if you ask me.
Randomize
