So my mom just called me into her room and showed me a condom wrapper she found in my room. "Oh that's from when I was like 16." I don't think that was very comforting.
I don't remember coming home but there is cereal EVERYWHERE
Now i know why people get high. I sat in the same chair for about 3 hours and the only thing i worried about was how far away my chinese food was.
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
Food Network. Taking bong rips everytime we want to eat. BOBBY FLAY.
he tried to catch his projectile vomit...then went back to beer pong
The only requirement is that his name is Kevin... All other factors don't matter to drunk me. Drunk me likey Kevins.
I AM HAVING A WEIRD OUT OF BODY EXPERIENCE. IN CAPS LOCK.
It's called the dick transitive property. It states if you touch a person whilst they touch a dick, you are also touching said dick.
Your vagina doesn't want to be violated with garnishes. I get it.
I'm wearing fairy wings and I broke my wizard staff. If this isn't the most happy but sad moment of my life , I don't know what is.
I had to try on three different bathing suits to hide my boob hickies
Haha idk you were stealing pizza dough at dominos
The beauty of getting kicked out of college again is I can fuck my professor's brains out and she can't get fired now
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