Haven't eaten in 11 hrs. I am gonna have so much material to talk about with anorexic girls now
Seriously, I'm delusional. Idk how these models even walk on the runway
if you find a joe biden blowup doll in the attic, I call dibs
just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
she told me i should dip my dick in chocolate and then let her blow me since it was her 2 favorite things. weird or my new valentine for this year?
You threw a hot dog at his face...I wouldn't call you either.
i caught him jerking off, doing his SAT Prep. forever alone.
True as that may be, are you coming to the birth of my imaginary child or not?
Btw: some husbands are not impressed by me trying to snap photos of their wives camel toe.
I'd go lesbian for $50 and a good phone case.
Now that mom and dad sold the camper, do you think it's okay to talk about all the sex I had in it?
A respectable fucking: good but like I don't want to get kicked out of my hotel room
Um..... I have taste. The only thing I am going to bedazzle is my vagina.
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
screwing the intern at work sucks when u find out the boss is too. She is a smoking hot though
On a scale of one to ten how bad is it that the first cardio I've done in months is jogging to the bars?
I'll just go with dedication.
Randomize
