Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
it was only during my walk of shame that i realized i was wearing the exact same outfit that julia roberts wears on the dvd cover or pretty woman. prostitution is my destiny.
ok so I'm texting you now like I promised instead of drunktexting aaron and telling him how badly I want his cock tonight. aren't you proud?
this is Aaron, hi
This girl named her kid Rainforrest. If I die, just know it was from laughing so fucking hard.
Matt is in the hospital again. the night nurse text me asking not to bring the boombox again. is it sad or awesome that they are starting to know us?
You guys tried to boil water to fill up the empty hot tub. After the fourth trip back with the kettle you gave up.
We blazed in her bathtub. All 5 of us. Not easy bro
They left at like 4. I got up to help clean their house this morning and we found his pants. No ones heard from him, we're all a little scared.
this is why ugly people need low self esteem. it stops them from doing shit like this.
They're frat boys at heart and have sickly, dusty, rotting souls.
I just busted my piggy bank to afford McDonald's. This is my personal cry for help.
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
I woke up to Elf. I don't know which one of you put that in my DVD player when I passed out but I appreciate you.
Dude she's from Moscow. I feel like I'm cheating on America.
i feel like you should know pants are always optional
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