New low: just hacked my moms facebook
The Lord gave Farrah Fawcett 1 wish when she died. She wished that all children in the world would be safe! The Lord granted her wish and killed Michael Jackson.
can u get pink eye on your cock?
A 20 minute car ride back to your car with the girl u had drunk anal with is the most uncomfortable thing ever.
If for any reason you were wondering if i was going to vomit at the airport today, the answer is yes.
I don't know how I feel about the stuff we got from that guy. Me and Monty are driving through town listening to static at full blast...
She ended up puking in the bathroom. But she's a good drunk... i told her to stay in there so i could dance til the club closed. She was still in the stall an hour later.
The man who lives downstairs is fluent in Russian, and also a playboy. You should meet.
I hate waking up Sunday morning and thinks "how many friends did I lose last night".... Normally it's between 1-5.
Are there edibles for sale in the Denver airport because if so bring those to my mouth
Nothing warms my heart more than the sight of a naked hockey player in my bed.
She was nothing like her profile said, we had nothing in common, and her picture mustve been like 30 pounds ago. But yeah we hooked up
Just fantasized about my boss's fingers in a meeting. I desperately need to get some.
When we sit on the couch watching TV, she always cups her hand around my balls. Not sure if it's a sign of affection or a "power play" to remind me just how vulnerable I am if she chooses to make an aggressive squeeze.
Sitting in the dr office she literally looked at my throat and goes have you been having oral intercourse
Randomize
