Your date looks like the Cloverfield monster. good luck.
yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
Ask me how many people I've slept with. Because its changed since I last saw you.
I saw you 20 MINUTES AGO. You need to stop this.
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
you go from almost hooking up with the hottest guy at the party, to going home with your ex....how is that even mathematically possible
Does this sound normal?...She's ironing on pictures of her dead cat to all of her green clothes...
i caught him jerking off, doing his SAT Prep. forever alone.
Going to have to start putting down newspaper if puking the bed is going to be a habit
Just found a bottle of tequila in the washer.
The slot machines are wishing me happy birthday. Mission success.
Well I blew a guy I barely know in full view of a homeless camp. That's pretty tame for me.
I didn't know where you were for like 15 minutes and then I went in the bathroom splashing water on the mirror and throwing hand towels around saying that you were "redecorating"
I just want to go home and eat bagel bites in my underwear
PEOPLE ARE STILL EATING FAJITAS IN DROVES. BY THE CASELOAD. THERES A FORKLIFT OF SIZZLING MEATS.
he just fucked me for my cheese..
Randomize
