I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
You took a bar mat shot.
In a min. With a stripper at the hospital. Business. Not pleasure.
He went THROUGH MY PHONE (he's 30 for God sake) then asked me why I was stringing along 12 guys... I told him he could have just asked me if I was banging other people and then saved himself from looking at pics of dicks bigger than his.
Law school has no idea what kind of prospect they have coming in. I just convinced a cop not to take me to jail by asking him if he really felt like cleaning puke out of his car tonight.
Just saw a midget on an elliptical. Epic.
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
I woke up sandwiched between them, all of us naked, and they were just sharing a cigarette, a donut, and the paper like it was just some normal post-threesome Sunday brunch.
I went up by the border of Canada. We took shrooms and went fishing...pretty sure we killed a dragon and ate it for dinner
Well its official, I'm into significantly freakier sex than even I thought possible.
So did I or did I not flash an entire concert last night?
It was 3 am when she drunkenly tried to deep-fry a banana.
How'd she do that?
I heard a crunch while giving him head. I looked up and he was eating Cheese Itz. So we made a deal that he'd take a hand job so I could eat them too.
Never drinking before a 6am train again. Just threw up at boarder control and had to pretend it was cause I was pregnant and not cause I trashed.
You make Europe seem so glamorous.
Randomize
