his internet history is a lot of porn, how to make a hovercraft and side-effects of jacking off too much
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
she got pretty angry when i tried to superglue her fingers together.
he has a knack for choosing the worst time to masturbate
we found you outside the hotel room sleeping with a note next to you that said " we made sure you were comfortable, hope your friends come back soon"
I think the pivotal moment was when we used the see and say as a drinking game with shots of whiskey. It was all downhill after that.
Europe's "the final countdown" was playing. It was pretty much amnesty for anything that might happen the rest of the night. It's a rule.
He said he only likes girls with a sense of humor, after he took his pants off I understood why
I spent the money she owed me on enough magnum condoms to make a blimp. Damn right I'm going to make the best of it.
His girlfriends signaled their approval by pulling me off of him and in turn making out with me. I think I will hang out with this group more often
my poor anus
If I walk downstairs and Kelly is fucking in the laundry room again I'm gonna die
I took a vibrator for a weekend with my parents instead of a boyfriend. I obviously have my life together.
Finally get to put my practical writing degree to use! I'm writing a craigslist ad for a threesome
YOUR MANICOTTI IS FULL OF LIES
Sorry i meant to send that to my mom
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