I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
We're going clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
What will that accomplish?
It will accomplish clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
Dude, I went home and roller-bladed into her bedroom so I didn't have a 'walk' or shame in the morning..I wouldn't talk to her unless she refereed to me as Brink
I got 87 likes on my changed relationship status. It's official. I'm way more fucking awesome single.
They're mostly guys
Early bird gets the worm.
It's that moment where you find out the girl you've been dating for 6 months is a mob daughter. Post breakup.
Some lady just walked up to me in the bar and proclaimed that I looked like a "shady motherfucker." Can't argue with that one.
Omg one side of my Labia is asleep. Has that ever happened to you?
I got to see a stripper that did magic last night. It was glorious.
I just moonwalked my socks off. THAT LAZY. THAT HIGH.
Im just an angry damaged little elf who wanders around and tries to find drugs.
Let's ride this possibly pregnant train together
you smell like vanilla and daddy issues
on the bright side i found your panties and the lid to the nutella
I've been in town for almost 36 hrs and I haven't made out with a stranger yet - I consider THAT a record!
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