i jus pukd everywherw but i took a showr, come cuddle
I wish "capable of destroying an innocent girl's life" is something I could put on my resume
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
Look, we all have our slutty phases. Mine is just forever.
I think the main reason you were throwing up so much was the quart of soap you chugged trying to burp bubbles. you came close
Our room will be decorated with my urine.
Craig, a bottle of Jamison, and I had a party on the roof last night. No idea how I got down. My injuries indicate fall...
After we were done the second time she turned to me and called me a Hardcore Armadillo. Also, her O face involves crossed eyes. You tell me.
my longitudinal study of the long term effects of sloth and alchol-intake is nearly complete.
so you are graduating this semester.
4 girls from the bar, me, strip basketball. here. NOW
Wait... All I had to do was ask for a sandwich and you would have come over
He's taking me to Tao. This is going to be so weird. How do you go on a first date with a guy that has seen you naked more times than clothed?
This band has the most fuckable violin player I have ever seen.
It's 5am and I come home to you naked on the kitchen table and 3 people I never saw before fucking on the back porch ... and my weed gummy worms are gone. fuck you I'm taking your mom's offer
I couldn’t resist. He had a camouflage condom. You know I love a man in a uniform
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