Psycho is an understatement. U were running around the house screaming IM UNDER THE IMPERIOUS CURSE
I feel like a bad episode of csi trying to figure everyone's DNA that's in me
She just looked down there and said "i breed horses. this is better than anything ive ever seen."
My god. We'll be gay porn millionaires.
its likemy ribs anf my hesrt aew cuddlingn
I just ate a bag of doritos while taking a shower. I can now officially do anything
Look. If you're going to be my girlfriend you need to be down with me licking BBQ off your face infront of kids.
That's how I like my men: traumatized and crying in a ball
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
Wanna shave the hair on my back? If you're offended I was joking, if not I'll bring booze and maybe you can do other regions too.
the amount of 23-year-old guys who have seen me naked is starting to get a little worrying
I think I'm gonna cut my hair just so I stop waking up with semen in it
the only things my left hand does: catch/hold things and masturbation.
I swear to god if you settle for a trump supporting packers fan, I will not acknowledge your children. You're better than that.
Is it in poor taste to drop acid before midnight mass?
I love this.
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