did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
Twist it, pull it, flick it... Bop it was like the first time I touched myself.
Fantastic night. drank beer from a wine bottle, danced on a van, chased a llama, and fell from a fence
I found your dream girl. She looked 11 but drove and on her key chain it said "if i am not wasted the day is"
but really, i care about skinny girls as much as michael vick cares about rotweilers
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
I'm concerned that this blind man on the bus has a boner right now
Oh and someone pissed in my shoes, so I'll let you figure that out.
I found three vicadin and a pint of fireball with the note. In case of emergency drink me under their sink.
I am having the most awesome nonsexual conversation about my vagina right now
CSI Miami is on and the guy is trying to save this woman who got shot. By stripping off his shirt & belt. THE WOMAN NEEDS YOUR PANTS OFF TOO
I managed all three standard threesome configurations a female-bodied person can achieve in just under nine years. I want to high-five everyone involved, but I've lost touch with a couple of them
Hi, I put a dog in your house, I hope it's yours.
He's completely obsessed with his ex but gives phenomenal head. So overall, yeah, good first date.
you were on a whole other level. you went home with him because he said "you got some light ass eyes"
Randomize
