i've been called drunk 4 times today and it's only 3pm
I feel like I am becoming dumber sitting here in class than I would be sitting on the couch smoking weed.
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
I'm glad my gym is open 24 hours..I stopped in on my way home to puke from the bar
His band may suck, but it's not like I'm sleeping with all of them.
He is currently pregaming mini golf. MINI GOLF.
Teeth make me feel like a dinosaur. Can you feel yours?
There is always the bar, but 2 30 on a Tuesday just screams alcoholism
Dude. There are selfies on my phone of me, wide-eyed, sucking my pillow. We did NOT split that bag 50/50.
We were fucking and his phone rang and it was his grandma. He just had a conversation with his grandma while fucking me from behind. Then his dad called and asked him what he wanted from taco bell.
You just put lesbians and Hogwarts in the same sentence. Of course I'm in.
I can't have my last hookup before 21 have been behind a dumpster
She's got Mike in the bathroom. He's covered in meat.
I just interrupted this girl giving a dude head in a parked car on the south side. Going down on your guy while you're parked in front of your house because you don't want your parents catching you is fine by me, just don't block the fire hydrant.
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
Randomize
