spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
I have one thing to say: spongebath.
I wish that wasn't all you had to say. And by that, I mean I wish you hadn't said that at all.
So she said she wears a diaper when she's on her period and I'm not going to lie, I kind of want to see the diaper.
As soon as the judge read that I rear ended the car from getting roadhead he chuckled. You know he's been there before.
My parents just out drank me... I cant get back to college soon enough
Of course I will... FYI I just gave my balls a crew cut.
I threw up in the darkest corner of the bar last night, then watched 2 girls freak out in disgust after walking through it. I then realised I puked on the dancefloor, took a picture and proceeded to send it to my mom.
She said she's different now I guess anytime you get a bible tatt it automatically cancels out all the whoring you did for 10 years
So here's a tip: don't give a blowjob the same morning you're going to the dentist. Cuz they will think you have "mouth trauma."
Well, he didn't buy me a birthday present but he sure did give me chlamydia so there's that.
you're like an angel sent from heaven to guide my sex life into greatness
Thats so sweet
You're like the Miss Manners of anonymous gay sex.
I don't know what that means. Any of it. BUT I will be at your house at 10:20 and you better be ready to get high as balls.
Guy from the bar last night left his number on my waterbill on the counter, at the bottom he put don't forget I can hook you up at Little Caesars I work their part time.
You sure know how to pick em.
I'm, like, this 🤏🏼 close to buying crocs
And you're also 🤏🏼 to never putting your dick inside me again
Randomize
