He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
what happens if a cat eats a birth control pill? i mean i don't care about the cat i really just don't want to get pregnant
She was Ugg boots AND a Bumpit. Of course I didn't sleep with her.
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
Lesbian chick is doing her presentation on the time she woke up on the dockside still drunk at 7 am. This is why I show up to chinese class.
If I come back covered in mud topless and banging on your door, please have a warm towel ready for me
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
I watched you fall asleep, sitting up, eating a cinnamon roll. You proceeded to wake up...smile at your cinnamon roll, ask it how it got into your hand and then began eating it again. You asked me if you were ridiculous last night, define ridiculous.
Would it be totally inappropriate to have his frat and our sorority Teebowing our exit from the abortion clinic?
Come to office depot with me I need help picking out a daily planner that will help me keep all of my casual sex dates organized.
Sounds good. Look at us. Planning sex like proper adults.
Okay. This morning the comforter was wet, you were underwearless and using a tiny blanket. What'd you do??
I'm pretty sure your ex of four years just had a baby with some kid and named it after you...
It's like the bat signal. He only texts me when I'm naked.
I love you but I don't want to see you naked.
Randomize
