My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
What do ugly girls do when they get too drunk at parties. They can't pull the whole "sorry i passed out on your couch but i'm hot so it doesn't matter "card
My doc was like ur only supposed to have 6 sexual partners..thats just one semester at college
No one understands that once a girl pours a handle of smirnoff all over herself, clearly she is wasted
apparently we spent 30 minutes inside that big Nike store turning all of their Duke gear inside out. for some reason the employees didn't stop us.
Decided in my tanked state last night purchase 2 weeks worth of xanax, so I can guess my way thru this week and finals. Soberly, I decided it would be a great way to test my knowledge of finance.
How do I ask where the Jello shot cups are at Walmart without sounding like white trash?
Only you could make a stripper uncomfortable by eye fucking her too much.
Probably for the best. My morning wood is pretty horrible. I wouldn't want to tip the earth's axis/ create a new magnetic pole
High-fiving last weekend's hook up in passing on the way to class has given me quite the lady boner.
He just pulled a Spanish chick using google translate!!!! We are at the bar and she speaks zero English. Hes a fucking magician!!!!!!
I swear to the sweet baby jesus I didn't fill your freezer with salsa and my little pony toys, but I didn't stop them either.
So I almost broadcasted the porn from my phone to the boardroom chrome cast
Never underestimate the power of titties
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