toast her oven
toast her strudel
inspect her gadget
Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
I know it's getting bad when I wash the bong more often then the dishes
between my moustache and how drunk I am it will be a miracle if I get laid tonight.
After all you put him through, I think it was only right that you saluted the bartender when you left.
Does this sound normal?...She's ironing on pictures of her dead cat to all of her green clothes...
Just so you're aware, tomorrow is "Slow Clap when you see Mike" day.
I feel like he knows I had a dream about him eating me out in the janitors closet at the holiday party. He's giving me THAT look.
During breaking dawn, he leaned over and asked me why she would have to worry about her period since she essentially just married a walking super-absorbant tampon... It was the best way to ruin those movies for me.
She roared AMY HORNEY and hulk hoganed her shirt off. Fuckin marriage time bro
IDK. when she left she was wearing her bra like an eyepatch and offering to shiver the timbers of the dorm patrol.
What I do when I'm blackout drunk is none of my business.
Build a thousand brigdes, lick one butthole. What am I remembered for? Buttholelicking.
it is basically gonna be an ugly Christmas sweater rave
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
Randomize
