the beds are so narrow its like a jenga threesome
we're taking shots every time my dog licks his penis. we're on number 8 now.
you should have been aborted.
as evidence of my kitchen this morning my night involved alot of mustard and condoms
I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.
Thank god i puked near the cancer center. makes me look like a chemo patient
just looked in the mirror, I fell asleep with a face mask on. At least drunk me cares that much about the condition of my skin
I will never swim in a flooded basement again..
Ok now I cleared out half the bar and Em and I have 5 Jameson shots lined up for you. You have 15 min.
At least your night didn't end with three cops seeing your ass and you sitting on the ground in a wig throwing your shoes at people
I'm drinking straight vodka and railing lines of adderall while writing a paper about the nature of Jesus. It's 6:50 in the morning. College.
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
We climaxed at the same time during ain't no mountain high enough. Does it get more cheesy or domestic for a non relationship?
A dick pic is not a proper way to say I'm sorry
I have successfully trained your dog to bring me pudding cups!
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
Randomize