You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
you used to get mad at me for mentioning 'unprotected sex' and happenings in my bed
well yeah, but then i realized the wisdom of your ways.
The only comparison I have for the iPhone is that it's like youre constantly getting a blow job
It would be like bopping for an apple with my penis but never winning an actual prize. The only thing I would get from it would be the joy from taking part but then regretting it forever more
Her boyfriend was hitting on other girls while drunk. But, she said she was okay with it because she is a feminist and she supports all women's decisions.
I'm thinking he has to buy me dinner at least twice before i even start considering casting him for "Fuck buddy - understudy."
I'm going to call you, don't answer. Need to practice moaning to your answering machine again
he just sat there, in the doorway of my dorm room, chuggin a fifth like nobodys buisness.. don't know whether to fuck him or be afraid of his confidence
Vodka drinking games. Where you wake up next to a douche lord and see your thong in the blinds.
The Medal of Honor you banged could be at the inauguration today. You really dropped the ball on keeping up with that one.
I think i'm going to homewreck at this Disney on Ice show.
Some girl woke me up at 1:30 am looking for weed and the next thing I know I'm in a hot tub with 3 girls, 2 40's, and a blunt.
I've decided that buying my first unused mattress has been my first major step into real adulthood.
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
Dude, the T Swift concert might not be so bad after all. Can you say milfs living vicariously through their teenage daughters? Score.
Randomize
