Conclusion from last night: Sometimes being classy isn't as fun as making out with a guy on a pooltable in a bar. Happy birthday, Canada.
he just kept saying that he had liquor dick..then he tried to fuck me without removing his pants.
honestly if we didnt hate the same people we would have a friendship based on nothing
I kind of wish I was already fat. So I could eat all I want and not worry about getting fat. Cause I'd already be at that point.
Im embracing the luau theme and maybe bringing a kiddie pool filled with alcohol. Im also embracing the high probability I will not remember this night.
She has a lazy eye!
My other option is a hardwood floor
She is just sitting by the bathroom like a little puppy waiting for a knight in shining armor to take her in there to fuck her. New low?
There is is 40 year old penis staring me in the face right now if there was ever a time to be a good friend its right now.
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
I want this pizza in and around my mouth forever..
Like I actually don't feel all that great but the fact that I'm not projectile vomiting at work makes life seem so magical
What's his name?? He crossfits 6 times a week, works in finance & is into the occasional felony class drug. His name is irrelevant in order to know if I wanna bone him again.
The stripper told Tom to sort his life out
I feel worse lying to the guy I hooked up with than I actually do for cheating on my bf
If you shit your pants and not say anything about it right before we have sex one more time I'm dumping you.
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