Yeah we had sex for the first time last night and all the text he sent me afterwards said was “heh”
wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
My google searches from last night: tetanus shot rabbit bite, Bacardi gluten free
I don't remember much, but my night is dated pre-Jaeger and post-Jaeger. Also, my boss may or may not have tucked me in.
Taking my infected piercing out in the parking lot of the food card place. This is one of those life defining moments that makes me sad.
Licking pop rocks off a stranger's washboard abs and kissing strangers young enough to be my kid. Yeah, it was THAT kind of party last night
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
Meet at Walmart straight from work to buy items for hurricane fun. Then blast some wine, make some sex, blast a bowl and cuddle each other till the sun comes up?
That's the most romantic New Orleans hurrication I've ever heard of. Can I have your babies?
The cop that got shot in the dick is here, let the entertainment begin.
I wasn't going to just ask my parents for a damn vibrator for christmas
My mind doesn't wanna day drink but my heart does.
You've discovered your super power: Your Vagina
As long as it's before midnight it's cool. But it would be understandable to ring in my new year shitting myself just before I go to Iraq.
one of my students asked me today if i was having a baby. fuckin 4 year olds and their lack of filter. time to get back to the gym i guess
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