office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
I just made a moltov cocktail out of lubricant and a christmas bulb. The fire is still going strong. MERRY CHRISTMAS
dude literally just took me 4 trips to take out the recycling from last night. we need to have parties like this more often
he's like a stage 5 clinger and he won't even fuck me. he has to be gay. my personality isn't really THAT great.
WHAT DO YOU MEAN I DIDN'T APOLOGIZE? THERE WAS A PEACE OFFERING MADE VIA TACO BELL.
My boyfriend correctly calculated the time I would be out of alcohol and showed up about four minutes after I'd run out with two bottles of wine. I think this is love.
Ok well hopefully you're not staging an intervention for me at your place because I'm bringing beers
Great. Now I have to produce, edit and leak a sex tape before Saturday. Fundraising is hard.
Nothing brings compassion from a group of cafe workers like walking in and asking if they have a 'hangover special'
This is ridiculous. I’m in fucking college getting high off a potato.
I'm 2 beers deep on an empty stomach, and I just wanna say, I pride myself on my use of commas
The little girl I'm babysitting is having a tea party, the water and chips she's passing out are doing wonders for my hangover.
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
Curing hangovers with more alcohol was a great idea for the first five days
So I'm never gonna get to see you again?
Hopefully.
Randomize
