so i woke up to her 8 year old asking for a bowl of cereal...
She said as long as i don't wake her up she doesn't care what hole i use.
Got yourself a keeper right there.
I miss Bob Barker.
Yeah, more like Douche Carey...
Wake and baked to watch the boston marathon. God I love massachusetts
gettin drunk isnt as much fun when i can use my own id for it
It's been five and a half years since she and my brother stopped dating. I feel like that's a long enough grace period. Going for it.
He doesn't make grammatical errors. Even while getting head.
she said she was living bicuriously through me.
Looking at an apartment in Houston. It's right beside my favorite bar and the zoo. Best or worst decision?
Pretty sure the cab driver can even smell the sex coming from between my legs
I just want nice things and good sex
as your best friend, I hope we never outgrow 'I Just Got Laid' texts
I had my first "Damn Kids/When I Was That Age" rant at work today. We need to drink this feeling out of me. NOW.
He went down on me while i ate a whole 7/11 pizza. New level unlocked
so my parents definitely heard me when I was cumming last night...
Randomize
