Then you jumped off your bed with your arms outstretched, yelled "I'm Goliath, watch out New York!" and then began singing the Gargoyles theme song as you 'soared' around your room.
Don't be ridiculous, the Gargoyles theme song has no words. How could I sing that mess?
You just started going "da da da da da! da da da da da! DA DA!!" then going "swoosh" as you glided about.
I just got wrote up for "repeatedly smelling like alcohol"
That was long passed due.
Last night Brynn convinced every person at the party wearing glasses that they stole hers, and she woke up with 8 pairs of prescription glasses in her bag.
i was like a deer caught in headlights with its coke-dick hanging out
i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
Let's put it this way, it's 9am and that box of wine looks like the cure
i got shots of sambuca dumped on my head last night. my bag still smells like licorice. making me nauseous.
it is a nice little reminder of the bruins dominance. if Vancouver had won, it would somehow smell of maple syrup.
I get hit on by the prison guards every time i go to see him. Seriously.
Could have been worst, could have seen me bent over biting her carpet while her son was inside me, i think i would have respnded with "i was just trying to be quiet"
Most girls get hit on with a $7.00 drink. You get hit on with a $750K plane.
Yea. I feel great. My life is great. My job isn't as shitty. And my daddy loves me. I love strip clubs. Great self esteem boost.
The moment buddy the elf found out he was human is exactly like the moment I realized I was gay
Just had a reminder come up that just said "Ham"
Currently eating a pop tart in my underwear waiting for the washer. Not one of my prouder moments.
Found out that I went to the same elementary school as the guy I'm hooking up with. Kosher or no
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