we're blogging at a bar
i can't put facebook on my resume under hobbies.
A squiggle pen was my first vibrator back when I was young. I would lock myself in my bedroom with that thing. Oh to be 8 again.
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
We just ended up getting drunk and doing field sobriety tests on each for practice... No one remembers who passed.
Do you ever feel like a plastic bag?!
OH. MY. GOD. FUCK HIM. JUST GRAB HIM AND FUCK HIM.
Felt like shit, jerked off, felt ten times better. Being a guy rules. It's like I got all the demons out in 5 minutes.
I went in to wake you up this morning and you had a condom draped across your throat like a necklace. There were no boys in the house last night, what were you doing?
And i'll likely end up sleeping in a bush wrapped up in my poncho
I think I might be harboring a Canadian in my womb.
I took a sleeping pill while he was in the bathroom. Time for a game of how long can we bang before I fall asleep.
You are both horrible and amazing
I think as a general rule I have to have blacked out somewhere at least twice to be comfortable.
I'm just now starting to feel better... I remembered sleeping on the floor. I was peeing and saw his rug and it looked so comfy
I gave my girlfriend a ring to celebrate our anniversary, she thought It was an engagement ring. Now im getting married and I don't know what to do.
Randomize