I went out, and slept with my sunglasses on
Just made a drug deal by throwing my money to my dealers window and receiving weed the same way. We are the definition of typical lazy stoners.
My natural self cock block skills kicked in last night. I could've got on like 2 chicks but i ended up throwing up all over my van instead.
just letting you know, you took a hit of the blunt while sleeping. happy birthday
I just listened to "Eye of the Tiger" and did 5 shots to prep going over to see him.
I just pictured my inhibition personified as little pink piggies with wings flying off into the great wide nowhere hahaha
How much more is Amanda Bynes going to rip out our hearts?!?!?
I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
I mean we don't talk anymore but I still see him around wearing that sweater he stole from me after we had sex
Apparently, Lolla sends you an email every time you use your wristband to buy a beer.
21 new emails...yikes
His name was Dragon. For real. How do you not sleep with a Dragon? Don't judge me.
So anyways, we returned the toilet paper and decided to use the money for taco bell and slurpees instead...
sooo, that video of you eating lasangna with the strobe going magically reappeared on my phone
dude, there is no doorman in your lobby and the front door is locked
oh yeah, sorry he's up here at the party. coming now
i dunno but you just looked at him said "youre making me really wet" and straight pissed your pants
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