youre lurking in front of me
Gte hit a new low, I took a poopnap, passed out mid poop on the toilet.
walking home from your place the other day I saw a man with a ponytail sitting on some church steps petting a plant
he should get drunk with us
I've decided to film a documentary centered around how he manages to keep that beast caged in such tight pants
You were so drunk you tried to sell your salsa to everyone on the restaurant.
i can't believe he got me to come over to him by waving a natty light at me.
I'm sitting in the drive through at Mcdonalds right now watching the workers pressure wash the vomit I left from last night.
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
You kept making that girl eat peanuts, saying they were good for her baby..... I don't think she pregnant
this just proves how much faith i have in "us".. what should we be for halloween..?
That's what my new years consisted of. Consoling heartbroken girls and having people throw up in my hands.
Ordained minister or not I hereby renounce all moral responsibility for any and all related occurrences
I think it was a low point but honestly at this point I've had so many that my life is like a valley
...is this motivational speaking, or sexting? It's getting hard to tell.
Just to clear things up, yes you did lick the strippers butt
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