i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
She invited me to an Eagles game, I mean that is almost better then if she told me she could only function with large amounts of semen in her system at all times.
I just wiped my face with a slice of bread. Lowest point of the night.
Its ok we found him,,, He is in the bathroom trying to write his life story on a roll of toilet paper.
Me and my vagina aren't speaking at the moment.
Decided to go explore a half built apartment complex at 4 a.m and leave a 3 block obstacle course in the alley ways on the way home.
That's the girl I met who was peeing on the driveway with me. We bonded
there's a strong possibility i came on your eyeliner last night bathroom sex was unplanned and rather messy sorry
Talking to friends parents while buying all the things needed for Jell-O shots. classic
You were discovered in a bush, smoking, and singing "in the jungle" to yourself. Which explains the scratches, but not the orange paint.
I just cut open the plastic package of a Plan B pill using the bottle opener I carry in my purse. #whyidrink
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
(440): please tell me you didn't have sex in my dress.. IT'S A VIRGIN DRESS.
He let me eat chexmix while we fucked... I think I love him.
Remind me to tell you about this weekend with them. It was the least fun I have ever had drinking. And I have thrown up pork and beer through my nose on the side of the freeway.
Randomize
