Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
I just met the 30 percent of the population with an STD
Just found 2 diff. colored pubes in my underwear..new record.
In the middle of getting a blow job, she looked up at me and said "this isn't the first time I've done this today"
the girl peeing in the stall next to mine has really cute shoes. on a scale of 1 to restraining order, how weird would it be to compliment them from in here?
Yeah. I don't think I have anything left in me tho. I think I was throwing up tangible memories at one point.
How bad would it be if I wore out the dress we got peed on in. You're the only one who knows.
These people don't understand my stages of drunk
For context, I was hiding under the pong table mooing at everyone by that point.
The toilet wouldn't flush at the club so I literally just shat in the garbage.
It was big, black, and had a smiley face tattooed on it. It was the perfect penis.
I have never lost more friends than while playing Uno drunk.
you left your anal beads in the dishwasher
I know where his drugs are but not my pants
This date is awful. He’s too boring to bang
Is porn accurate? Can I order a pizza and do the delivery boy?
Randomize