just come out here and I will go home with you...
Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
someone put bongwater in my humidifier again THIS NEEDS TO STOP
Do you think I can haggle my way to discounted weed on 4.21?
Forgot to mention there might be a picture of me being thrown in the air while at a Mexican restaurant
he rubbed his balls on my face to wake me up.. this friends with benefits thing is getting out of hand.
She bit a glass in half.
I bought a 9 dollar purse from payless so if I throw up in it tomorrow, no biggie.
He woke up in the ambulance thinking he was still in the club.
Some kids in a school bus just saw me jacking off in my car. This is how 89% of children find out about sex.
I hate to stick you with the friend but I did all the work.
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
He suffocated between her tits, but she didn't notice because he still came.
The awkward moment your booty call shows up to the Mexican restaurant and realizes you just picked burritos over pussy
she said she was so hungover this morning in a way that sounded like she was apologizing for thinking she was attracted to me last night...
Randomize
