There was an extended period of my adolescent life where my friends and I would get high, drive around in my minivan listening exclusively to the wu tang clan, and intentionally crash into snowbanks
you know what scares the shit out of me? i have eaten bagel bites since i was a little kid and just in the past five years they started puting "made with real cheese" WHAT THE FUCK WERE THEY USING BEFORE? i mean ive been a bagel biter since the womb
I don't know what he did but now I'm terrified of mustache rides and it's only movember 3rd
these girls were driving down the road screaming "SHOT!!" out the windows and pelting potatoes at passerby.
i got hit in the ear.
THAT DOESN'T MEAN YOU SHOULD LET ME CHUG VODKA.
He was dressed in a pink dressing gown feeding people ketamine from a plastic sword he called Excalibur. how was your Monday?
We're having a serious conversation and I just responded to something he said with an emoticon. I am so baked.
She had YOLO tattooed on her ass. Like, one cheek said YO, the other said LO. Even I can't handle that level of hot mess.
Dude you chased a girl around the yard and then fell over the curb. Face first. You got up on your own tho so you reached champion status
My mom just found my nipple clamps...... oh God why....
Please let me buy the coffee, all my assets are in starbucks gift cards
He really only has clothes, like 4 boogie boards, and a bong here.
Never in my life did I think i would give a blow job in the bathroom of my old elementary school. Twice.
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
I'm really busy with my period
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