all her text said was "asdfhdaufhudshfuds" and i knew that meant come over
considering I showed up there after a xanax, 2 bottles of champagne and some coke, no shirt and someone else s husband... I'm sure you can figure that one out.
I am sitting here. Drinking from a bottle of vodka. Eating shredded cheese from a bag and waiting on him to pick me up after he finishes with his girlfriend. This is what dreams are made of.
They make twin pack pregnancy tests for girls like us
He made me keep his swollen nut cold with frozen bags of peas while rubbing his tummy because he said I had no choice.
Definitely worth waiting her kid to got to sleep when the first thing you hear once she's back is "I want you in my ass right now"
If you don't get head tonight I will castrate you
Seriously. Castrate.
So apparently someone caught him as he was falling. And carried him around the rest of the night.
This stupid maranara sauce stain sucks. It keeps distracting me and it looks like I'm staring at my tits.
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
i just told him to get ready, because I'm going to be taking out my anger over the Super Bowl out on his penis.
I texted him "my vagina is pounding for you"
I know, you made me proof read it.
I should probably apologize for licking you last night since you drove me home, but I stand by my decision
i think i'm just going to start having sex with his brother, he's much hotter and it would definately be less illegal.
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize
