I miss having pregnancy scares ....at least i knew i was having a good time
you ate skittles off the table like a hungry hungry hippo. it was awesome.
She only remembers me when she's drunk. It's like I'm a suppressed memory that only surfaces with alcohol.
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
On 3 separate occasions, she grabbed my bullhorn to announce to the entire party she had fucked me.
At second job interview this week. Wearing pants to hide pole dancing bruises. This my life.
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
He made me twerk for scrambled eggs... I regret nothing
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
I just faked an orgasm while masturbating. Idk what exactly my problem is but I have one
When you licked the fourth stranger's cheek the bar tender pretty much ordered us to get you out.
I just wanted a bootycall and now somehow I'm at his parents playing dominoes. But they have tequila so it's cool
Listen, some people have dreams, some people just want to cock slap a kangaroo
Got lost on the way to my dealer again. He stayed on the phone with me untill i found him and then hooked it up because I got lost.. What a genuine person.
I collect Covid conspiracy theories like I collect Pokemon.
Randomize
