she started talking about my kids
was she topless?
I just looked at the guy in the car next to me and he was wearing a divers mask. We just nodded cause we both understood.
threw up in the kitchen showroom. home depot employee of the month.
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
I dreamt of sea otters and your boobs. My two favorite things.
Now that weed is legalized There needs to be reusable bags for people to pick up with. All this plastic is so bad for the environment and a waste
just almost had a panic attack because i couldn't find the granola bar i put in my purse. i miss klonopin.
His cat kept scratching my feet while we were having sex. There's only room for one pussy around here. It also concerns me that he owns a cat.
Woke up on the floor with shoes on my hands...I'd say it was a success
So I'm already mostly naked in a kind of bed but obviously too lazy to take my boots off. It's like January 1st is already here
YO I WASNT TRYING TO MAKE A PASS AT YOU.... Or Jesus
I think he bit my vagina. Who does that?
Your roommates will be treating you to many anecdotes about my intentions to have aggressive sex with you. I'm sorry in advance.
I promised her before I left that I'd make good choices and then got drunk and fucked my best friend and her boyfriend.
don't worry dude i have your phone, text me when youre gonna come get it
Randomize
