it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
handjob tips. give me some.
Just saw a Mexican guy pushing a stroller with 3 twelve packs of corona in it with a toddler struggling to keep up on foot behind him
she bought me drinks at the bar, made me pizza at her place, gave me head, and then drove me home...i think i might propose
it's amazing how much more room there is in my purse when I'm not carrying alcohol in it
She used my dick as a microphone to sing "any way you want it" I'm in love.
I'm sorry. I think I have multiple personalities. Or it was the acid. Either way. I'm sorry.
She's walking around topless with a bottle of red wine, crying and singing showtune ballads. This is actually an improvement.
The last thing I remember was you puking all over the inside of my door and him yelling "PUKING RALLY!!!"
However today I got my lube that might I add was dripping out of the box. I'd like to think my mailman was mixing business with pleasure.
yeah I had to wear a fucking diaper from work home so I didn't get the shitty squirts all over my cars seats it was fucked
I brought her cheeseburgers and tequila but she's still mad at me.
Nothing like an afternoon walk of shame across campus on parent's weekend. Damn.
He has the fingertips of a God
The last time we went to a costume party, you walked around in a loincloth with a cross and said you were Jesus. I'm eager to see how much more offensive you can be.
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