talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
Just got back from doctors appt. He lied. It wasn't a pimple on his dick.
When i light up a cigarette people look at of like i'm going to pee on their children.
Just watched 1 guy 1 jar with my mom. Awkwardville...
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
i used the phrase horny rhinos in my paper. i hope my teacher appreciates the size of my balls
I've realized that you're the only friend i can rely on to drink with me any given day. i thank you for that.
I was sitting on the floor of CVS chugging white grape juice until someone asked me to leave.
I'm so hungover that if we go to panera, I'll probably get a bread bowl to throw up in.
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
i just thought a plastic bag was my cat. i just pet a plastic bag. that high.
I just masturbated while watching Say Yes to the Dress
This is what my life has come to
Why is it pressure? I want to see your cute face and possibly sit on it. You make it like its a bad thing.
All I know is that I got to have an orgasm yesterday during sex so nobody can put a damper on my day, NOBODYYYYYY
He passed out before we could have sex. I had no choice but to use his boner to hold my onion rings.
Randomize
