Do you have a straightener and are extra lubricated condoms not the norm?
Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
I'm telling everyone at work the mark on my neck is a hickey but really I was taking a shit while straightening my hair and burned myself
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
I just spewed blue gatorade in the shower. It looked like the ocean.
that's not even the weird part though. he already knew where the bathroom was, he might have been here before..
My night ended with Em alternately crying and throwing up in the arms of a guy wearing a cutoff and a tiara. I sat holding a garbage can and wine glass full of water wondering how our night got to this point.
You're wrong. It's my BIRTHDAY. We all know it's impossible to get pregnant on my diva day!
mom had to come pick me up from the hotel. I crawled to her car. She told me the entire way home if I puked in it I was going to lick it up. Like high school all over again...
Like he held up the condom afterwards, twirled it with his finger, and said "look at that load"
I woke up with a cutting board and a bag of uncooked pasta next to me.
currently working on a look that screams, "I'm dead inside, but still trying to enjoy the ride"
He fucked me over, so I'm going to do what any rational woman does. I'm going to get really high and have sex with his brother.
There is a man in my bed with "new zealand" tattooed on his back. Wtf happened last night?
I would let him fuck me right here in this laundromat. Praise Satan.
Randomize
