i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
Those balls look pretty dangerous.
You gave him your vagina and this is what I get in return? This is bullshit!
I was in a threesome last night that turned into a violent domestic dispute with damage to a hotel. Wish you were there!
I just had to tell her that no she really doesnt need to sneak pizza from mcmurrays out in a plastic bag for me later
I'm going to have to take an awkward trip to the front desk to ask them if they found a pair of turquoise shorts and an "I'm the Mom" sweatshirt.
it would be cheaper just to buy a dildo to intimidate people with.
if I'm at school tomorrow just indulge my moment of pity and let me cry on your shoulder
I'm not a horrible person, I just see what everyone chooses to politely ignore.. And occasionally say it aloud whilst deeply intoxicated.
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
On Tinder, guy asked me if I had ever been fucked by a Pokemon master. Needless to say I didn't respond.
Why I hate online dating: not even one day in and a 57 year old asks me to call him "Daddy."
There was a clear and well defined point last night where I could've decided to go home but no now I've woken up with glitter all over my nuts and potentially an std or 2
I just described cereal to my mother as "acoustic breakfast soup".
who is this
Randomize
