But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
I just saw a neon sign in a bar window that says, "open to Public" but the L is burnt out.
last nights makeup is better than no makeup at all.
I didn't cheat on him. Cheating means finding out. I made sure he was at work first. After the guy left I got shitfaced just so nothing seemed out of the ordinary when he came home.
Pretty sure I went to the bar in my bathing suit, sweat pants, and high heels.
he puked in his toast at dennys. after snoopdogg high fived him. couldn't be prouder to be his bro in law.
she pinky promised me she was 18
I would like to apologize for asking to take advantage of you, wishing you a horny Hanukkah and whatever "abd ethw prnym to mzbe yur penis cna be friends" means.
Kripsy Kremes at our place, bring your own coffee. And your own donuts because these ones are ours.
It's not socially acceptable to be drunk in adult world. That fact makes me die a little inside.
Buy Actually if the police need to find my body I'm on an air mattress in an apartment near a McDonald's that's all I see out dat Window
He seemed genuinely disappointed when I told him I wasn't going to make out with him to Bring Me To Life by Evanescence so I feel like I've pinpointed the breaking point of this relationship
We fucked like animals on that lion king beanbag chair that your mom got you for your 10th bday
This drunk girl kept yelling for water so I dipped a cup in the toilet and gave it to her. She was thanking me all night.
Shhh embrace your inner whore. Just embrace it.
Randomize
