bella threw up all over the kitchen floor then looked at me, laughed, and walked away
isn't bella the cat???
that she is
i keep telling myself in the mirror "get undrunk"
I cant believe I just managed to do a drug deal across the country for you...
Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
Fell asleep in bio again. Sometimes i feel like college is just one really expensive nap.
I just made a friends list on fb of all the guys ive hooked up with. genius.
Doing Jager Bombs on a Sunday morning is justified...How else is my team going to win?
Im officially canceling McCormick Monday. I got a raise.
Sooo grey goose Tuesday?????
They just keep looking funny at me. No one has attempted to tell me that I don't make sense though so maybe they're all way more high than I am.
I still don't understand if he's using me to write his resume or if we're dating
Well my normal tinder strategy of "Will I have sex with her when I'm sober" has been paying off
All my friends are getting into relationships and going through breakups and I'm having Plan Bs and crunch wraps for dinner.
Your liver needs more exercise - we start training tonight.
No, I'm not a heathen. You two are the heathens, I'm the whore.
I don't know if I'm dying or this is just a mild inconvenience
Randomize
