To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
things it involved: vodka, boy parts, possible photos of me on a cell phone. things it did NOT involve last night: my bra, his pants, and sobriety.
so my mom just told me that she wouldnt pick me up and take us to taco bell at 3AM...
so jimmy johns showed up at our party last night. our house is sponsored now. living the dream.
Why do I feel like I'm not the only one drinking to make my night class teacher look better?
His concept of male bonding is doing lines in adjacent stalls.
let's remember the whole point of NYE: to drink antisocial amounts of antisocial drinks, become incoherent, ruin a carpet, talk to a tree, wake up with head sellotaped to toilet. The where/how is superfluous, my vote goes to a cupboard and a bottle of jaeger Questions?
Think I pulled my pelvic muscle.
I think I pulled my ashamed of myself muscle.
dude, you declined head because you wanted to tell her about how you put cinnamon in your weed. also, we're low on Chef Boyardee
I really don't think there's anything more liberating than farting.in a loud bar where no one.can.hear you
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
You know it was a good night when you wake up w/o a shirt in someone elses living room next to a pancake on a spoon in a bowl of spaghetti.
skipped tacos for a blowjob. No tacos. No blowjob. More importantly...no tacos. Wtf?
Mike's letting gay guys do body shots off him again.
My boyfriend, ladies and gentlemen.
We're getting a bucket of chicken and screwing around, so no, you can't join us.
Randomize
