i just wanna soil my oats bro
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
Someone sharpied 'shit show' on my tits. Someone with excellent penmanship
You deserve yourself a blunt and a build a bear.
You know who really doesn't like surpise in-your-face air guitar solos? Strangers.
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
i was gonna do a lot worse than just throw cat food on you while you were passed out, but then you sleep vomited and i felt a little bad
I'm laying in bed with a case of beer,.. That's how this break up is going..
Can you please reassure him im not a scary or intimidating person? And that really my entire life is a series of completely ridiculous events that have led me here?
I think the old lady next to me at the bar just saw your pussy
I'm confident that their children would come out as 100% authentic rats
She had a tattoo on her pelvis that said "it's cock-o-clock" an had clocks and hot dogs exploding away from it. I'd like to tell you it was deal breaker buuuuuuut.......
I feel like I should have backed off when "I love you" came out on the third date. Now I'm in her bed wondering which door my shrine is behind. Fuck.
Goddamn it. Hes got me addicted to his penis
Who is this? I have a text from you last night telling me your name and to train hard for Tuesday, please make this make sense
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