I wish i knew how bad drinking and hieghts were before i got up here
even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
I'll tell you what, we couldn't have asked for better binge-drinking weather.
You woke up in the middle of the night and told me we won the sweepstakes, the penis sweepstakes.
I don't know what he sees in her. All I see are horrible pancake nipples
I'be color coordinated the clothes in my closet and my underwear drawer. I'm like an advertisement for house arrest. Help.
So I'm at the VFW tonight and the shot special here is straight 151 for 2 dollars. They must hate our livers
Every part of me is in agreement...but mostly my vagina
i vomited out of my nose in three different houses so far, i will be back for my boots tomorrow
I just need to stop hanging out with girls who drink wine coolers.
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
Tomorrow we start training our livers for St.Patrick's day. May God be with us.
The morning after your company Xmas party and that moment you're eating a block of cheese in bed wearing a sequin blazer and recalling all the details of your one night stand with a coworker who happened to start that day...fuck.
Should I tell him how he got the bruise on his ass or just enjoy his theories?
Randomize