I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
I just farted for five sidewalk sections! New personal best.
You better be watching. There will be a POP quiz. Each correct answer gains you 5 more minutes of the sexual act of your choice
whatever, you made your decision to be a responsible student and where did it get you? a pushed back exam and no blowjob.
You do realize that we got a stripper to do the YMCA for us on the main stage... Right?
i swear, as soon as they invent a cure for herpes, he's mine.
You just met him on Thursday, and you've already nicknamed him Golden Penis?
Nothing like puking into an empty cooler at a red light on the way to get plan b.
I had to show the prof your text saying that I could pick up your midterm for you. I covered the part of the screen saying you weren't there because you were about to have morning choke sex.
Just got offered a dog by two Meth head's one of which wasn't wearing shoes and continually saying "fuck"
I want Walter White to make me a bologna sandwich while I'm chained to a support
I give all credit to my lucky thong, there's never a time I haven't gotten laid while wearing it
I'm tired, but I'm gonna go with "I watched the debate last night and part of my soul died"
On another note, I almost lost one side of my fake butt. Dancing the wobble with the fake butt isn't recommend.
Oh also we fucked while one of the old Rudolph movies was playing on tv so it was festive
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